1. |
The Ballad of Big Slaps
03:32
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Well I was born out west on Prairie soil
A couple hundred miles south of the land of the oil
I was playin' tunes as soon as I could stand on my own two feet
And at the age of 6, on a summer's day
My papa took me to see Willie play
And that's when I knew it was the country life for me
I learned a little fiddle & a little guitar
But the strings & the wood, they never brought me far
I needed somethin' more that could really make a big tune slap
Well the chicken dance man said "sit on this stool"
My legs, they got to shakin' & I started to drool
That was the day that the drums & cymbals fell into my lap
Well they call me Big Slaps
I got a kick & a snare & a set of hi-hats
Honky tonkin' as much as a prairie boy can
Slappin' harder than Bam Bam Bigelow
Doin' 105 on the open road
If you need those skins slapped hard
Honey I'm your man
Well I like Johnny, Dwight & Merle & I love Corb Lund
Hank, Hank Jr., Dolly, Brooks & Dunn
I was raised on the greatest hits of Stompin' Tom
So crank the George Jones & the Riders in the Sky
A little bit of Joe Diffie & some Charlie Pride
But when the jukebox gets shut down
That's when I'll be gone
Cut ahead a couple years, now I'm livin' out east
Keep my liver in check & my arteries greased
But I need that honky tonk juice to keep my life in line
So every time I'm about to have a fit
Yeaton calls me up, he says "grab your kit!
We're goin' down to the fuckin' gig to have ourselves a time"
Well they call me Big Slaps
I got a kick & a snare & a set of hi-hats
Honky tonkin' as much as a prairie boy can
Slappin' harder than Bam Bam Bigelow
Doin' 105 on the open road
If you need those skins slapped hard
Honey I'm your man
Well they call me Big Slaps
I got a kick & a snare & a set of hi-hats
Honky tonkin' as much as a prairie boy can
Slappin' harder than Bam Bam Bigelow
Doin' 105 on the open road
If you need those skins slapped hard
Honey I'm your man
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2. |
Shittin' on Company Time
02:30
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Well there’s a secret that I know of
That’ll lighten your load
When you’re on the assembly line
You’ll be printing off gold
Just as soon as you know about
Shittin' on company time
Shittin' on company time
Doin' a #2 at the 9 to 5
If you’re ever sick of workin'
Well y'know you should be certainly
Shittin' on company time
Doesn’t matter if you’re cookin, buildin' bridges 'cross a brook or haulin' coal out the back of the mine
You best believe you can get a little relief if you’re shittin' on company time
Shittin' on company time
Doin' a #2 at the 9 to 5
If you’re ever sick of workin'
Well y'know you should be certainly
Shittin' on company time
Well I know some yearn for the comfort of the seat that they got waiting for 'em back at home
But sometimes laying down that turd is just what you need when you’re on the job all alone
Some might say I’m throwin' in the towel
But a healthy set of bowels is worth more to me than nickels & dimes
So as long as long as I’m workin' in this cage making minimum wage
I’ll be shittin' on company time
Shittin' on company time
Doin' a #2 at the 9 to 5
If you’re ever sick of workin'
Well y'know you should be certainly
Shittin' on company time
Shittin' on company time
Doin' a #2 at the 9 to 5
If you’re ever sick of workin'
Well y'know you should be certainly
Shittin' on company time
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Jacob Cherwick St. John'S, Newfoundland and Labrador
For inquiries contact: jacobcherwick@gmail.com
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